Ghost Lover
by MeinBritishBroski
Summary: He was feeling, breathing, loving someone who was not there. Lovino and imaginary!Spain. FINISHED REQUEST. Rated M for mentions of extreme mental illness... or something.


_finished request for Silan Haye. i hope you like it, love, though i certainly messed up on it..._

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><p>To say Lovino was having a rough week was probably the biggest understatement ever made.<p>

No one said hello to him in the meeting. No one asked him how he felt. No one smiled at him. Normally he wouldn't have minded this, but today he actually made the effort to speak to people and he was being _blatantly_ ignored. His brother might have sent an inquiring glance his way as he held hands with that stupid potato-freak - but what did that mean? Absolutely nothing because it was the same fucking look Feliciano gave to everyone he saw.

Francis didn't even care enough to smirk or wink at him. Had he been acting weird lately? The answer was yes.

He mulled this over as he walked home on tired feet, confusion creeping in to his heart like some nasty disease. It was crippling him and making it hard for him to find his breath.

_"You poor boy."_

I'm fine.

_"It must be horrible."_

It's bearable.

_"Don't you ever get lonely?"_

No.

Because every time he went home, dinner was in the oven, the radio was on and singing out the fluttery rhythm of Spanish love songs, the house was cleaned, and he was _happy._ He didn't have to speak to avoid feeling awkward - because the silence was invigorating. It filled him up and he basked in the feeling of not having to constantly answer questions. Things were whispered and arms were wrapped around his waist lovingly.

Suddenly it was all right to voice his insecurities. So he did. It hurt and rubbed his throat raw and made his fingertips go numb. It was wrong - he shouldn't wonder about things so trivial. Antonio was real, he was there, and he loved him; that was all that should matter. It definitely shouldn't matter that Antonio was acting more and more like a puppet, playing out the same routines, responding the same way every time a word was uttered.

"They keep saying you're not real."

"Do you believe them?"

"No..."

"You have doubts." Antonio breathed. Romano tensed.

"Sometimes I wonder if anyone loves me."

_"I_ love you, Lovi."

"But why does that matter?" Antonio just kept smiling like he didn't feel the pain of the words, "They keep saying the country of Spain doesn't have a personification. But you're here... why the hell are _you_ here? You're not a person."

"... I love you, Lovi."

"Say something else, damn it."

"Do you want to lie down?"

He allowed himself to be steered into the bedroom with reluctance, he frowned when the other got on the bed and beckoned to him. His hand was grabbed lightly with strong, tanned fingers and he fell down beside the other, sighing haughtily.

"I love you, Lovi." A broken record. He wouldn't stop.

"I love you too." Romano responded, closing his eyes. Maybe when he opened his eyes Antonio would be gone.

_I've felt him. I've let him touch me. I could see him, I could smell him, I could touch, taste, hear, and love him. I'm his. He's mine. If Antonio was fake..._

Then so was Romano.

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><p><strong>AN;** The first prompt the requester gave me killed my muse for a long time. I could not write it, and to be quite frank, my wrist started acting up and it was a literal pain to type it. I deleted it all after finding it to be quite extensive and non-emotional and out of character. It was not something I was used to writing and neither is this. So sorry the format sucks and it appears as though I vomited words from my fingertips.

**explanation:** Quite a few years ago when I was fascinated by the human brain I came across an article of a "ghost limb" basically, the woman's brain perceived another arm sprouting from her chest that was not there. But when she was hooked up to registers and told to touch her real arm with her ghost arm, it registered touch. So, if the brain registered touch then I think it's safe to assume the brain could also register all other senses.

So that's why Romano sees him.


End file.
